Friday, May 30, 2014

Judah Sleeps: Bower Power May Picture Party

If you have followed me on Instagram for any length of time, you know that I have a strange addiction to taking pictures of Judah Bear sleeping. I even started using the hashtag #judahsleeps on them, although this odd habit started long before I started hashtagging. 

The challenge for month two of Bower Power’s Picture Party is ‘Sleep.’ (See my month one photo here) The idea was to get a photo of someone sleeping. Obviously this is not hard for me since my son falls asleep pretty much everywhere, but I had to put forth a little more effort in order to capture him with anything but my phone. Here’s what I got. 

The Boy comes into our room almost every night at some point, and on this morning I somehow woke up before the little guy. 

I also went through my Instagram photos and picked some of my favorite #judahsleeps pictures for your viewing pleasure. You’re welcome. : )

Monday, May 26, 2014


Do you ever feel like all you’re doing is failing? Like you’re pedaling so hard but still rolling steadily backward?

I see other moms out who have all their kids in clean clothes with hair done and smiling. And the mom herself is in good shape with cute clothes, great hair and a smile on her face. And she sits down and feels her kids something stupid like veggies and hummus with fruit from her garden for dessert.

Then I look at my little crew with their dirty nails, scraggly/frizzy hair and mismatched clothing (“But Mommy! I want to pick out my clothes!”). And me with my belly hanging over my almost-too-small jeans, hair in my standard messy ponytail, and bags under my eyes. Telling my kids that if they don’t finish their lunch (corn dogs) they won’t get dessert (ice cream). And I think: where did I go wrong?

I know that mom has other battles. I get that. But still.

I wake up and feel guilty for what I give my kids for breakfast. I feel guilty that I let them watch a show in the morning. That I just want them to be quiet for a bit and let me wake up. That I don’t want to play a made-up game that doesn’t have any actual rules and never ends.

The problem I see is that there are just so many ways to fail. I fail at eating healthy foods and feeding them to my kids. I fail at losing weight. I fail at budgeting. I fail at yard work. I fail at keeping our vehicles clean and in good order. Being understanding with my husband. Being understanding with my kids. Being a good friend. Not praying enough. Not reading my Bible ever enough. Not figuring out how to use my new camera. Not keeping my house clean enough. I fail at keeping up with laundry. Keeping up with dishes. Calling family. Reading to my kids. Making sure my soon-to-be-kindergartener knows her freaking alphabet. Looking like a decent human being when I leave the house.

These are all just off the top of my head! I could keep going. I know a lot of this is expectations I set for myself—thank you, Mom’s Night Out—but I still see falling short of those as a failure.

The point that I guess I’m trying to make is that I’m struggling. I have no words of advice. This is a battle I’m fighting. I just wanted to put my digital pen to paper and let it be known that there is someone here who is in the thick of this. If you end up reading this and any of what I said sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Let’s fail together. I’ll bring brownies.

Saturday, May 10, 2014

Payback for Parents

To my dear and wonderful children,

I love you very much. But I feel you should know that as you grow and become the amazing people you will be, I am planning ways to get back at you. In love. This will all be done in love.

*I will pick my nose in public and then ask you to take the booger. If you don’t, I will wipe it on your back and you won’t find it until you get undressed that night. So you should probably just take the booger when I offer it.

 *I will come into your bedroom every single Saturday morning and jump on your bed at 6:00 am. I will then alternate between screaming and whining until you either cry or make me breakfast. Either one is fine.

*I will not eat anything you make. Ever. As a favor though, I will rotate the use of the words ‘nasty,’ ‘gross,’ ‘disgusting,’ and ‘looks like poop’ so you never know what’s coming. 

*When you have friends over I will come and tell you every time someone looks at me weird, makes a mean face, knocks over my stuff, breathes on me, or talks to me. Or if they don’t do any of those things I’ll let you know they’re ignoring me. 

*I will always ask you questions when you’re on the toilet. I will walk in and comment on your thighs and cellulite and ask why your bottom looks so different than mine.

*I will spill wine (because I’m a freaking grown-up and I can drink all the wine I want) all over your clothes right before you leave the house. But you won’t be able to change because then I’ll start crying and you’ll have to comfort me

*I will unfold all the laundry you fold. All of it. The rest of your life. I'm serious, kid. It's gonna be epic. 

*I will wet my pants in public and then just stand there in the middle of the Target One Spot and yell that I did so. Bonus points if I can eke out a turd.

*I will make very inappropriate statements to strangers at every opportunity. That nose ring looks like a booger, you have owies all over your face, your breath smells like poop. That kind of thing.

I’m sure I’ll think of more, but for now I’ll just file these away for future use. Payback’s a—very unpleasant thing, kids.

With love,

Saturday, May 3, 2014

Sing Them to Sleep

When I was little, we watched movies like Mary Poppins, The Sound of Music, and The One and Only Genuine Original Family Band (which I’ve already mentioned once.) One of the things we loved about those movies was the music. Great songs like “Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious,” “Do Re Mi,” and “Secret Love” are among my favorites.

One of the things I have loved doing with my kids is singing them some of those great old songs. Bedtime is one of the most stressful times of the day for me, but I have found that taking the extra few minutes and singing them some soothing songs makes a real difference in helping them settle into bed.

Our go-to songs at bedtime are “Stay Awake” from Mary Poppins and “Edelweiss” from The Sound of Music. Nine times out of ten, Judah is asleep by the end of the first song. Obviously, I’m magic just like Mary Poppins, but it’s also such a lovely song (even when I sing it) that they just lay there and soak it up.

Next time you’re getting the munsters ready for bed and you think a nice mellow song would help them wind down a bit, might I strongly recommend these? They are magic, since Mary Poppins and Captain von Trapp sang them. : )