Last week the kids and I spent a few days at my sister Tiffany’s house in Omaha. She and her little family are preparing to list their house for sale and she’s packing and painting and organizing like a boss. (I love that phrase, by the way!) It just so happened that the first day we were there was New Year’s Day and in the true spirit of trite conversation, I asked my sister what her resolutions were.
One thing that’s important to know about my older sister and myself is that we are both cynical. Not in an “I hate the world” kind of way. Just in a “sometimes life punches you in the face and then laughs as it kicks you in the gut” kind of way. You know what I mean, right? Everyone has had to deal with their crap in life. Tiffany and I like to laugh at it all and just call it an opportunity for humor and a phone call. : ) Someday maybe I’ll write about all the stupid stuff we’ve collectively had happen to us. Should be interesting.
Anywho, we were painting the trim and doors in her upstairs hallway—a horrible job, to be honest—and I sprung the resolutions question on her. In true ‘Thalls girl’ fashion, we laughed and made jokes about resolutions and how unrealistic they are. She listed off a few of hers after thinking about it for a minute and then asked me for mine.
If you’ve been around here for a while, you know that I blogged last year about New Year’s Choices rather than resolutions. As I stood there putting another coat of paint on the linen closet door, my mind flashed back to that post and how quickly I abandoned my goals. Complete and utter failure.
Do I really want to make resolutions for changes that I may or may not keep? Do I want to give myself something else to fail at? Something else that I wanted to do and couldn’t? Something else that I have to look back on and ponder how foolish I was to think I could be…better?
Yes, I would like to lose weight. I wanted to lose weight last year, too. Do I want to be more organized? You betcha. I wanted to achieve that last year, too. Do I want to write more? Uh-huh. I wanted to do that last year, too. Are you seeing a pattern here?
The next day, a friend of mine posted something on her Facebook wall about a gratefulness challenge. She linked to this blog post that summed up my thoughts and fears so well. The writer of the blog, Ann, is responding to her friend’s question about why she wants a ‘do-over’ for 2012. Here is the part that was so true to me:
“Well…. do I tell you that 2012 was the year I didn’t lose 10 pounds, forgot every morning for. a. year. to exercise, didn’t finish reading the Bible, failed to write what I really wanted, never got the basement backroom gutted, rammed about in the same ruts on rinse and repeat, only read half as many books to the kids as I’d planned, and missed living up to what I’d named this year?”
This was it. This was just how I felt. In a rut. A rut I just can’t see a way out of. So although I do have goals for this new year, I think that the one thing that will be best for both me and my family would be to focus on all the blessings that God has given me. I ordered the book One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are just today, and I’m looking forward to getting started! I’ve even got the perfect notebook sitting around from a past resolution that never happened. All set to go. I’ll let you know once I get the book and get started. Feel free to join me! : )